Hier ist einen Poem...I remember writing this on the night I said that I wasn't gonna watch 'The Grudge 2 (Japanese version)' with the amigos cos it didn't sit well with me. It dawned on me that my refusal to watch the movie and my refusal to ever 'go out' would cause them to think that I was on some 'holier than thou' tip and was judging them, when really it's not like that at all. So this was the product of this thought.
Titled with the date on which I wrote it.
15.11
I'm not saying that I'm better than you
Or more holy than you
Or more worthy of God's loving arms than you
In fact I wish you heard me screaming the complete opposite at the top of my lungs
I AM NOT WORTHY!
I just want you to know that I'm not looking down on you, no not at all
For when I'm flat on my face, prostrate on the floor in humble worship of the God who's done above and beyond what I deserve from Him,
The only place I can look is up.
I'm trying so hard to become the person God wants me to be
The kind of person who doesn't conform to the world
But is transformed
And maybe that comes across as stubbornness
But trust me,
My thoughts are more of a mess
Than yours
It's a process
And for me
I must outrightly resist the things that my flesh desires
Finds appealing
The things with which it conspires
To orchestrate my downfall
Sexual tension tighter than violin strings
The deep bellow of the cello echoes my deep thoughts of things
Unspeakable
My failure to surrender my everything to God requires more attention than the rave or the club
I'm not being super spiritual when I say I don't feel right about engaging in certain activities
I just don't want to voluntarily immerse my soul into captivity
And no, I'm not boring
And yes, I'm flawed and
Sometimes I'm wrong
And I've nowhere near worked it all out
But yes, loudly I will shout
I'M A FOLLOWER OF CHRIST
just trying to live my life right.
No comments:
Post a Comment